Downtown

For the longest time I use to think, "there's no time to waste." My life, love, my career, House of Cool... all of it couldn't move fast enough to catch up to my dreams.  I spend periods (long periods) wondering if life could ever match up with the over active imagination of grandeur I day dreamed of. Truth is: Life is Sweeter this way.  My energy, my persistence, the emotions life can endure, the happiness... Life is better if you're willing to go through the journey. 

If that's one thing I can teach you, Arielle, it's let life unfold and don't peg time as a crutch. Sometimes, not all, having an unpredictable life so long as you keep working towards a goal can be the most satisfying moments of your life.  Of course there are a few things you don't miss - like being there for friends and family, or opening the door for a stranger and helping out those in need.  But be patient with career and love - those happen over a life time and doesn't have to be discovered immediately.  I met your mom later in life and in truth, any earlier and we would not have made a connection as we did that has set us out on a journey that has been the best life has to offer.  

Have failures, make regrets, read, write, absorb and learn math along the way.  Play when you can and always work harder than you play.  Be patient with creation - the finish line isn't aways as clear as you think it to be.  Time is never a waste but don't spend too long in moments that drain your emotions.  Go on discoveries and be with the people that enrich your soul.

Be happy my little Downtown.  

Your Pops

Generation to Generation

My Pops landed here with nothing to his name except for the promise of a new start.  With my mom by his side they set out working in factories and learning what it means to be Canadian.  Being the ignorant first generation kid, I grew up at times wondering why we didn't have as much as others did. You don't learn about making a living as a kid, you just understand that you can't "afford" the things others have.  I told myself that I would be different, my life would be filed with the things I wanted. Instead of seeing my Pops working 2 jobs for much of my teenage years doing 11am-9pm shifts selling suits and then 10pm-4am at a chicken factory as something commendable and hardworking, I viewed it as none sensical and even shameful.  At the time I couldn't see the sacrifice and sense of duty he gave of himself.

My Pops lives his life respecting others, wanting everyone to laugh, always the last to leave and first to hold the door open to let you pass.  I could not imagine a better father; it's the same type of dad I want to be: encouraging, teaching self discipline, enduring hardship, being creative, being a family, being a decent human being.

Today I enjoy many of the things that didn't come so easy when I was growing up.  I wouldn't appreciate them as much if it wasn't for my dad showing me what hard work and selflessness can give to your soul - Now that's a life worth living.

Enjoy retirement Pops.

Good Morning Little E

Ender has slept with us for nearly 15 months in our bed-- Every parent will tell you this is not a good habit.  For the past month we have been sleeping training him to sleep in his own little bed.  He wakes up often crying and whining.  One of us would go to his room, lie beside him, comforting him til the whimpering ended and he fell asleep again.  

A couple of times I would pick him up and bring him back into our room.  He'd snuggle in the middle snoring happily probably dreaming of pushing buttons and hiding remotes.  

This morning he slept throughout the night.  Soundly in his room, I kept waking up feeling he was going to cry but he didn't.  I even got up and checked on him only to find the little bad breath might contently sleeping.  I found myself unable to sleep through the blissful silence.  I'm a poor sleeper to begin with but truth be told, I missed him because he no longer missed me.  As much as I wanted him to sleep in his own bed, my heart urned for the tossing and turning of those little arms and feet that kept me up so many times before.

I think being a parent is much about these in betweens.  Knowing you want to always be there for your child and need him to want you... yet, knowing they need to be independent to find strength and courage from within rather then from "mom & dad."  I know there will be so many more in betweens of parenting and behind my exterior of a "super manly dad," I'll be sad to let go.  But it's powerful to know your child is coming on to their own.

I do love you little man.

Life's not worth holding back